Sgt Frog Abridged - Episode 3 (script)
The following is unedited from the original document except for formatting. Lines may have been rewritten during recording and/or editing. Script Narrator: Today’s episode begins with Keroro and Tamama watching their new TV. *Turns to TV showing “my sweet guinea pigs” by Fabienne2212* Narrator: *Deadpan* Whoo. Tamama: Eh, let’s see what’s on Disney. *Click* Keroro: The what? *TV explodes* Tamama: Oh come on, it’s not that ba- okay, yeah it is. Sorry, Sarge. Keroro: *dazed* Yeah… Jalapoly my waffle flabergize, Trix Rabbit…! Tamama: Look out, Sarge! It’s an old people commercial! Giroro: I’m not old! Tamama: Quick! Get off his lawn! Pichu: Okay, lights in three, two, one, hit it! *Boom, Spotlight on TV* Singing TV: *Operatic* I’m just an old TV - *Explodes* *Cuts to the three sitting at the table* Keroro: Eh, the book was better. So, Giroro! What have you been up to? Giroro: I’ve been spying on the humans. Er, Pekoponians. PikPik Carrots, whatever we call them. Keroro: You forgot “Pick-A-Melon”! Tamama: And you forgot “Choose-A-Banana”! *Cuts to the montage* Giroro: So I want to say I’ve been studying their habits, but really I just watched the girl shower each day. After day…after day… And then I FOUND YOU. What the fuck were you doing?! You were cleaning! Keroro: *Flirty* H-hoh, go on. Giroro: Fuck this! I say we take over their house! Keroro and Tamama: *Voice cracking for no reason* YaAaAaAy! Keroro: Okay, so here’s the plan. We're going to take a can of soda, and put it on Natsumi's desk. And when she goes to pick it up, we grab it and run out saying "Nyahnyahnyah nyah nyah nyahnyahnyah" and run back to the room. Giroro: … *Intense* Let’s do it. *Immediately cuts to Giroro flying through the window* Keroro: S-…So mission fai- yeah, mission failed. *Attempt 2* Tamama: Why is she shaking the can? Keroro: Oh hell. Duck! *Sound of spraying soda. Giroro flies through window again* *Attempt 3* Keroro: I got the soda! I got the soda- Tamama: You’re supposed to put it on the desk! Giroro: You just took it from the fridge and ran. Keroro: Oh. *Pause. Giroro flies out window again* *Attempt 4* Keroro: Okay, let’s try that again, but this time we’ll use Dr. Pepper- Giroro: NO! I’m picking the plan this time! Phase 1- We distract the little weirdo by filling the foyer with crap I stole from the neighbors. *Cuts to Fuyuki seeing the objects* Fuyuki: Hey look! It’s a never mind I forgot. Hey Sarge! Giroro: WHAT THE FUCK?! Fuyuki: Oh wow, another frog! Giroro: *Pissed* Hey kid, you wanna see a magic trick? Fuyuki: Yeah! *Fuyuki is suddenly tied up to Keroro* Keroro: I didn’t know I was a volunteer! *Slightly pissed off* I didn’t volunteer. Fuyuki…you’re chaffing my everything… Fuyuki: *Excited* When does the magic happen?! Giroro: That’s it. Fuyuki: Aw, I wanted to be sawed in half. Giroro: I’ll think about it. Phase 2- We cover the entire house in tripwires and bombs. The little pink-haired backscratcher won’t know what hit her. *Natsumi bursts into the room* Natsumi: Quit fucking around in my room! Tamama: But he’s tied up right now- hehehe, yeah. Giroro: How the hell did you beat bombs with a leek?! Natsumi: *Dramatic* You can diffuse anything when you force a meme! Keroro: *Excited* Really? So if I say one I can get out these ropes? Natsumi: I said “diffuse”. Keroro: Oh… *to himself* It’s over six… Aaaaaaahhh…! *Natsumi hits Giroro and sends him through the window again* Giroro: Maybe it’s all the glass in my head, but Natsumi… I think I love you… Nah, it was the shower-! *Hits trash can* *Cuts to Natsumi’s face* Keroro: So, mission fail- oh, I already know. *Cuts to night time over the campfire* Keroro: When’re you gonna buy me a new toothbrush, huh? *Whack* *Deadpan* Hahaha, I feel hurt. Narrator: The following day, in darkness… Keroro: How did we get here?! Giroro: You threw me down a hole. Keroro: I saw a bug…down the hole. Tamama: What about me? Keroro: I saw your hole. Oh my god! Kululu! Kululu: Hegh?! *Echoing* *Lights turn on, Kululu appears* Keroro: Oh wow, I was just joking! Kululu: *Dramatic* Hello my friends *quick change to pissed* the fuck do you want. Tamama: He sounds like a parakeet. *Keroro hits Kululu on head with newspaper* Kululu: *Very quick, defensive* Hegh! Keroro: Bad bird! You drive him to the hospital right now, mister! Kululu: *Anxious* So do you guys want something? I have lotion stocks I need to check. Keroro: Well we do want you to make a base- *shows base* oh…you did…*Slightly depressed* This job’s too easy. I’m gonna start sucking. *Credits* *Post-Credits 1- Dororo* Narrator: *Exciting* Next time on Sgt Frog Abridged! Dororo: I’M ZERORO! And I’m not in the team. *Later* Dororo: I’M DORORO! And I’m in the team. *Post-Credits 2- Blank* Kululu: *Listing things off* Alright, paid off the toilet guy for surveillance; hacked the Kero Ball; pan-bombed the bipolar girl; and gave Mr. Lady some Tylenol. *Slightly dramatic* Now I just need to reunite Viper with his son, and get me a box. Snake: The Orange will help you! Category:Episode Scripts